First visit to Tiruvannamalai

I first visited Tiruvannamalai on 21 July 2018. At that time I was in Bangalore on temporary work and on that Saturday I decided to go. It would take 5 hours bus journey one way; I thought I will start in early morning and would be back by late night. I started out from Christ college bus-stand waiting for one of the TNSTC green striped and wooden floored busses. I could not read Tamil, so I took help of some of the fellow passengers at bus-stop to identify the bus for me. Once in, I luckily got the seat; the bus was nearly full and I still remember the faces of the conductor and driver. I don't remember much about the journey except that I was constantly chanting Sri Ramana's name and as Tiruvannamalai approached I was so eager to see Arunachala for the first time from the bus. When I saw that beautiful and still hill with the notch that is visible while coming from the north-west side it created stillness and feeling of reverence in my mind. It was one of the most peaceful experiences to have Arunachala in my sight, it was like being face to face with divinity itself. 

Upon reaching Tiruvannamalai I first visited the main temple of the town - the Annamalaiyar temple or the Arunachaleshwar temple. Sri Ramana also made this temple his abode for first few months after arriving in Tiruvannamalai in 1896. It was afternoon and the main shrine - the inner most one with the presiding deity - was closed for darshan. Temple courtyard was open and I went inside. It was hot afternoon and I was walking on heated up stones of the huge temple courtyard. I recognized the thousand pillared hall immediately. This was one of the places where Bhagavan stayed. A part of this hall is now renovated and and there is Sri Ramana's portrait at the entrance. However when I went it was not renovated and I saw it in its old glory. It was almost empty and there were painted plaques made from sheet metal affixed on the walls where Sri Ramana stayed or sat. 'Bhagavan Sri Ramana Maharshi stayed here when he came to Tiruvannamalai' or something like that was written on those white colored plaques in long blue colored letters in English. Approaching one corner where one of the plaques was fixed, tears started to veil up in my eyes and my head became heavy. It is hard to describe this experience but my mind totally froze and became still for few precious minutes. I cried at that place feeling and touching those very stones where Bhagavan would have once rested on. I felt lucky that on this ordinary afternoon, I am getting to come near to places that God himself inhabited more than a century ago. It was like coming to home or to an anchor-point of life. I remember I sat down in that corner just meditating for few minutes on Sri Ramana. Then I went to Patala lingam shrine which is underground in the thousand pillared hall. I had read that Bhagavan lived for many days (when he was 16 year old boy) so deep in Samadhi in this shrine and that insects started to crawl over his body and started to eat his legs that people had to physically extract him out of it. Again I felt tears in my eyes and I couldn't help crying when I saw this small beautiful and unassuming underground temple. These were some of the most significant moments of my life so far.

Then I came to Sri Ramanasramam and I had first darshan of Sri Bhagavan. I felt deeply impacted by the whole atmosphere of the Ashram. I remember I entered the New Hall and towards my right there was Sri Ramana's seated statue carved out of black stone. Behind it was the black marble Simhasana. I arrived and stood in front of him in New Halll with my hands folded, uttering his name in my mind, thanking him for bringing me there and inspiring me to make that journey; submitting my life to him; this was an event I won't ever forget. Then I did darshan at the mother's temple (Matrubhuteshwara temple - Sri Ramana's mother's Samadhi shrine), sat in dark on stone seating area behind huge doors of the temple listening to chanting and sounds inside. It was a great meditative experience. Then I entered the large Samadhi Hall full of light and space via the door that opened in it from the New Hall (I didn't know these places' names and their history when I first visited - but later during my readings I came to know) and stood there in front of Sri Ramana's Samadhi shrine for few minutes praying and observing his golden hued image. True silence of the mind and glimpses of what my new life could be were surrounding me from all sides. Then I sat down in that hall resting my back on the wall and tried to meditate and be silent. I was able to see each and every thought arising in my mind with total detachment as if I had become a third person and watching my older self. My head's left part (which was facing the Samadhi) felt heavy and I felt something was changing inside of it in almost physical manner. I felt as if it was being pulled by an invisible force emanating from the Samadhi shrine. I sat there in that state for an hour or so in deeply peaceful concentration, detached from my life, and grounded. It is hard to describe this experience in words. 

When I came back to my hotel room that late night in Bangalore after a tiring bus journey, I was a changed man. I knew something significant had just happened on that day; that which always meant to happen in my life. I felt something was done to me that was my destiny. It was the intense start of a major change process inside me that is still going on and will continue till I reach my destination.